Tuesday, December 4, 2012

A Case of the Mommy Guilt

Alright fellow Mommies...I have seen a lot of this floating around Facebook and Pinterest lately...
It looks a lot like reversed Mommy Guilt.  Something I get on the regular.  Only thing is, I don't always shower...and there are days, or weeks, that I don't always feel that I have succeeded in really keeping my child to his optimum well being.  Alive yes, but sometimes barely. Talk about feeling guilty.
Take this weekend, for example.  Hubby was out of town and I had big plans of getting some things done around the house.  First priority, tackle the two ton load of clean laundry heaped all over my bedroom floor. Halfway through folding the first arm full (I can't really even say load...they weren't exactly coming straight out of the dryer) I hear a thud, screech, and crying coming from the pantry.  Boogie, while helping himself to some popcorn,  had dropped a can of pineapple on his foot. One day, one trip to Urgent Care, three x-rays, and four "special treats" later, we return home with a broken toe.  Five days later, guess whats still sitting on the floor in my bedroom...the laundry.
Or this year, for Halloween, Boogie and I had to carve pumpkins on our own while Hubby was at work.  That meant that I had to do all the dreaded scooping by myself.  After hollowing out two full pumpkins, I thought I may need to amputate my arm (yes, I am very out of shape).  I just didn't have the energy to create an elaborate, to scale image of Diego or Muno on the face of my pumpkin.  It wasn't happening.  So, instead of failing my little one, we pulled out the power tools.  Win, win for everyone involved.  My kid thought I was so cool while we were plowing holes into our pumpkins to make "stars", AND, best of all, it was a shortcut.  We did make one traditional jack-o-lantern (we are talking triangles at their best here), but that was really only because Boogie asked.  And because I was totally shocked that he could both say jack-o-lantern and knew what it was.  At least my carving was kept to a minimum.
But, I feel you Mom's.  I work from home and while it is a GIANT blessing, it also makes things really difficult some days.  Sitting at the dining room table, attempting work, while a little one is vying for your attention (not always in an appropriate fashion) gives me a massive case of the mommy guilt.
The truth is I am the Mom that is creating reindeer shaped treats for my sons class, but only because I didn't do the laundry, or scrub the floors.  And because I spent four hours glued to my computer screen when all I wanted to do was play cars....I feel guilty sometimes too.  I choose to partake in the things that sound like fun to me and, consequently, also make me feel like Super Mom, at least some days.  And some days, I just can't...there's work, house stuff, showering...etc :).  Do I let my house go to shambles? No.  Do I put off other things to spend time with my child? Yes.  We just can't do it all.  We can't...there's not enough of us to go around.
So, stop being so harsh on yourself fellow mothers!  And lets remember, we are here to support each other.  Don't hate on the Mom that sent in hand wrapped gifts for each child in your kids class for Christmas...she probably works 50 hours a week and stayed up until 3:00AM getting it done.  It may be her only way to give back.  Me on the other hand, we paint on the floor because its fun for both of us.  I make homemade glitter infused play dough, because it looks pretty and because I don't want to do the dishes. But I make reindeer shaped goodies because I want to.  And yes, I kept the ugly ones my kids helped with for us as home...judge away...
Also, so sorry for being away for so long...we have number two on the way and I just made it out of the first trimester.  So, needless to say, blogging was on the back burner with all that laundry and dish cleaning.  There was not much reindeer treat making either, mostly sleep. But I'm back for now and feeling more and more human every day!  And having some amazing pregnancy insomnia.  Anyone down for some 2:00AM blog ramblings?  I have a feeling you're in the right place.


  1. YAY! I always have Mommy Guilt! I hate working 12 hour shifts, I'm never there for my daughters school things, I can't pick her up from school. I feel as though I never see my kids! When I do have days off I'm so tired because of the pregnancy, or have the tons of laundry to fold or the house to clean...which is in total disarray (don't judge)...but it's the worst feeling in the world! I feel as though all other moms are better than me at this and my children would be better with any other mom.

  2. That's totally why I wanted to post this. We mommies need to stick together and support, not judge! We are ALL just trying to get by. And I would never judge on laundry. I just refuse to fold it!!